Your two-year-old: Milestones and development (2024)

Big emotions

A child this age wears her heart on her sleeve - and in her voice, her fists, her stamping feet, and her crocodile tears. You seldom have to guess about a 2-year-old's emotional state. Expressing emotions is healthy, even when they aren't happy ones. So don't feel you have to rush in to placate your child at the first pout or sad sniffle.

Let your child know that it's okay to be unhappy sometimes - it's simply part of life. Swooping in to vanquish the unhappiness sends the wrong message - that it's not okay to feel sad or mad. Solving every problem for your child also robs her of the opportunity to work through her feelings on her own.

What you can do: Help her label her feelings. "You're so mad at Mommy because she said no park today!" Let her know you have the same feelings, too, sometimes: "It makes you feel sad when we say bye-bye to Grandma. It makes me feel sad, too." If your child screams or hits when she's angry or upset, show her acceptable ways to vent her emotion, like punching a pillow or stamping her feet.

Easier to get along with

If you find yourself bracing for those fabled "terrible twos," relax. It's the second year of life (the one you've just passed through) that's among the more challenging developmentally. The actual "twos" tend to be a bit calmer and even more fun, even with your child's sometimes giant emotions.

Now your child can move about with confidence and play with less assistance. He can make his wishes known better than before and understands even more than he can say. And his boundless curiosity is balanced at least a little by an increasing understanding of rules.

Two-year-olds do test limits and disagree with parents, of course, but they're also developing more of a desire to please you. They want to be good! They want to help! Routines and consistency in your responses help your child learn the ropes and keep everyday life running smoothly.

Changing diet needs

It's time to make some changes to your child's diet: Once your child turns 2, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that you reduce his fat intake to less than 30 percent of his daily calories.

One way to do this is to gradually switch to lower-fat dairy products. Ask your pediatrician about specific guidelines for your child.

You don't have to monitor fat intake zealously ,and you should never cut out fats entirely; your 2-year-old's growing brain and body depend on healthy fats for proper development. And many dairy products that contain fat are also terrific sources of calcium.

For the rest of his diet, provide a balanced offering of whole grains, lean meats or beans, fruits, and vegetables.

Soon your child will begin looking more like a "big kid," as his limbs and torso start to lengthen and his proportions begin to resemble those of an adult. He'll gain about 2 1/2 inches and 4 pounds this year.

If you're concerned that your child is overweight, talk to his doctor rather than imposing dietary restrictions on your own. Kids have different nutritional needs than adults, so it's important to get professional guidance.

Places and spaces

A toddler is aware only of what's immediately before her. But by 2, a child grasps the relative placements of things, and her understanding of space - where people and objects are - expands between 2 and 2 1/2. This includes concepts such as "there," "where," "inside" and "outside," "go away," "near" and "far," "way up in the sky," and "over" and "under." She's gaining a better sense of size, quantity, and other spatial relationships.

You can see this new grasp of spatial thinking in the words she picks up and in her growing ability to follow directions: "Bring me the ball that's over in the corner." "Look on top of the bed."

Some ways to reinforce this new understanding:

• Talk about where people in her life are when they're not with her: "Daddy's at work." "Grandma lives far away."
• Play games that involve moving toys on or in or through other objects.
• Give a series of simple instructions that involve different directions, such as first putting a toy on the chair, then under the chair, and then giving it back to you.
• Ask questions that prompt him to think about location: "Where do birds live?" "Where do airplanes fly?" "Where's the door?" Don't expect a correct answer every time or turn it into a quiz; just make questions like these part of your everyday conversation.

Afternoon naps

Once your child has dropped her morning nap, the afternoon one becomes more important than ever. Go easy on the number of errands you have to do in a row and mind the clock. Try to be home by naptime. Kids who fall asleep in a car seat or stroller do rest, but their quality of sleep isn't the same as when they sleep in a bed.

Vocabulary building

Your child's vocabulary is on its way to becoming dictionary-thick. Research shows that children whose parents talk to them often build bigger vocabularies. So give her plenty to listen to. In addition to the comforting and nurturing words drawn from your daily activities, be sure to talk about less familiar interests, like lions and tigers found in books or zoos, or changes in the neighborhood.

The typical 24-month-old knows about 50 to 75 words and is working the next big milestone: stringing them together into phrases and sentences. Two-word noun-verb sentences are typical at 2: "baby sleep" and "want milk." She'll probably begin expressing herself in longer sentences as the year goes by. If your child uses fewer than 20 words, she should be tested for hearing problems.

First sentences tend to be short (two to three words) and to the point: "Mommy help." "Play ball Daddy." Or a 2-year-old may echo a group of words she hears often, like "Go bye-bye" or "All gone."

Some ways to encourage your 2-year-old to speak in sentences:

• Expand on her bare-bones phrases in your reply: "You want Mommy to help you put your sock on." "Okay, Daddy will play ball with Lucy."
• Don't correct her grammar. Casually repeat the sentence using the right words, but it's way too early to point out mistakes.
• Don't insist your child repeat a full, proper sentence. Prompting, "Can you say, 'Mommy, help me with my sock?'" only disrupts the flow and frustrates your child.
• Read often in an interactive way, asking your child questions about what he sees on the page or what she thinks will happen next.

Organizing the toys

If you're feeling like the clutter around your house is growing right along with your child, you're not alone. Not only do 2-year-olds continue to acquire toys at an alarming rate, but more and more those toys - blocks, puzzles, car collections - come with multiple parts, which 2-year-olds love to dump out and mix up.

Individual bins for each type of toy can help keep things organized. (Empty diaper-wipe boxes are an inexpensive way to keep track of smaller parts.) Save yourself clean-up time by putting out only one or two bins of toys at a time. This keeps the toys more interesting - and the floor tidier, too.

Look ahead to 25-26 months